Top 5 Valentine's Books to Devour

If the topic of introducing sex toys into your bedroom repertoire or how to do anal sex for the first time or what the eff’ing heck is a yoni egg are not hot topics of conversation at your next dinner party then you can bet your bumhole you’ll find them waiting for you in a book. 

I mean we read books at school at some point didn’t we? We even managed to learn stuff from them on occasion. Maybe they are a lost art as we all turn to thumb scrolling through social media instead. BUT. Books = knowledge and if it’s sex knowledge you’re looking for then hit that library and arm yourself with some saucy sex intel.

Let’s build that stack of bedside table books into a pile of red hot, nerve-tingling, orgasm-boosting reads.

Here’s our top 5 recommendations to feast your eyes on and stroke your way through.

  1. Moregasm: Babeland’s Guide to Mind-Blowing Sex

Described as “beautiful” with photos that are “necessary, not seedy”, this book makes compelling reading. It lays bare the differences in male and female bodies in respect of sex drives. Sex is normalised by the author but in a way that doesn’t take the sass and sauce away. For US readers you can shimmy on down to Babeland and pick up those sex toys you want to experiment with. 

  1. The Ethical Slut

With its controversial title, this book will split opinion. It’s the ‘go-to’ for polyamorous players, exploring relationships from all sides, numerical combinations and angles. Whether you’re looking to reaffirm a monogamous relationship or justify feelings towards a different type of relationship, this book explores sex and intimacy beyond the limits of conventional monogamy and society’s view towards it. 

The book seeks to serve as a guide to navigate the world of polyamory and how you can maintain a successful relationship. Much of it is spent interviewing millennials who have grown up with more freedom around relationships, society and the rhetoric around what is deemed ‘correct’. Whether you reach the end of the book convinced monogamy is ‘how it should be’ or whether you’re reaffirmed in your belief that polyamory is becoming more normalised and you are on the path you want to be on remains to be seen. What is commendable though is the author continues to release latest editions and each edition moves with the times. 

The original edition broke radical new ground, the recent third edition is nuanced and accepting. A positive nod of wisdom towards realistic approaches towards relationships. 

  1. She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring Women

The success of this book is in the title. If you’re finding the female body a mystery then buy this book, grab your highlighter and read it. Read it twice. 

Cliteracy is the new ‘thing’ and all you ‘ill-cliterate’ (see what we did there) lovers out there will reap the rewards and a mouth full of fanny juice once you’ve consumed these tips. I mean did you know that the clitoris has 8000 nerve endings? If you’re not giving your partner an orgasm every time you dive down there then you need to take a good hard look at yourself because that's a whole heap of nerves to have a go with. 

The book argues that oral sex is so much more than foreplay. It can be the epicentre of an explosive sex life. A shared mind-blowing experience of pleasure and deep contentment. 

Don’t give up on paying some lip service to your partner. Get reading and then dive right in. 

  1. The Erotic Mind

Whose mind doesn’t wander away from ‘vanilla’? The secret fantasy, silent acknowledgement of a ‘kink’ that turns you on. Plenty of us and yet we’re afraid to voice them. Should we step outside of what society considers the ‘norm’? Am I ‘wrong’ to be feeling the desires that I do, the wants, the touches, the objects, the experiences I want to explore?

This book goes beyond ‘self-help’, it seeks to reassure you that it’s absolutely fine to embrace the intricacies of sex and sexual desire. There is a gentle nod to the uncertainty of sex, its outcomes might not always be planned or what we expect and perhaps this is the fear we all carry. The fear of sexual rejection. The fear of sexual disappointment. 

So read this book if you need a little sexual reassurance. Come away from it with confidence in your own fantasies and your pursuit of self-discovery. Read it and then go on that journey where your mind is open and your libido utterly sparked.

  1. Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life

Written mostly for a heterosexual female audience, this book does provide an insight into women’s sexuality. However, if you’re a man having sex with a woman this could prove educational. For the scientists out there, the book lays bare the neuroscience behind sexual desire and how our brains fire lust, orgasms and intimacy. 

Yes the cover is bright pink and yes it has a vagina staring at you. This does not by any means limit the audience. Its medical foundations and insights are fascinating and will transform how you view sex and the dynamics of sexual relationships. 

No matter what gender, sexual orientation or relationship status you are, the science behind sex being a ‘drive’ provides an exceptional understanding of desire. 

Obviously practicing sex is always a good way to learn, improve, and experiment, but one way to learn is good old fashioned swatting up on a book. So grab that hardback, download that audiobook, take notes if you need to and then go with the old ‘practice makes perfect’ mentality when you transfer your newfound knowledge into the bedroom. 

Happy reading iPlaySafers!